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Goblin or Not

Title: Goblin or Not
Author: Kat Lee
Fandom: Labyrinth
Character/Pairing: Jareth/Sarah, Hoggle
Rating: PG-13/T
Challenge/Prompt: beattheblackdog 104: Bend and 1_million_words Say What Friday: "May those who love us love us, and may those who do not may the Lord turn their ankle so we know them by their limping."
Warning(s): In a way, this fic makes light of some serious disabilities. I just want to say right here and now that I do NOT share Jareth's humor in this particular area, but I can see him thinking what he does is funny. I actually have a good friend who suffered a similar fate but, praise the Lord, has turned her life around is actually managing to walk and even wear flip flops when the doctors said she wouldn't!
Word Count: 1,301
Date Written: 23 March 2018
Summary:
Disclaimer: All characters within belong to Henson, not the author, and are used without permission.





“YOU WILL DO IT,” Jareth thundered, the walls of the royal, Goblin palace shaking with his fury, “OR I WILL DUMP YOU HEADFIRST INTO THE BOG OF ETERNAL STENCH!”

“OH, NO, YOUR MAJESTY! NOT THE BOG OF ETERNAL STENCH!”

Jareth kicked the Dwarf off of his freshly polished boots. “OH, YES, HOGGLE! THE BOG OF ETERNAL STENCH! NOW BE GONE WITH YOU, AND CARRY OUT MY WILL!”

“Yes, my Liege!” The Dwarf scurried for the throne room’s exit, leaving Jareth to collapse back onto his throne, Sarah to look on with sympathy, and the Goblins to whisper about how he’d gotten into trouble yet again.

Jareth leaned his regal chin onto the palm of his gloved hand, then tapped his pouting lips with two fingers. “It is so hard,” he murmured, “to find good help these days!”

“Maybe if you didn’t scare him so badly,” Sarah retorted.

“It’s the only way to get work out of him, Sarah! You’ve seen how lazy he is! He’s such a sloth that if I allowed him to do anything at his own rate, bugs would fall off of him!”

“Jareth, that’s hardly -- “ Sarah stopped herself, not wanting to hear another tirade on her concept of fairness.

Jareth tapped his lips again, this time in thought. She didn’t ask what was on her husband’s mind, but he acted as though she had. “I was just thinking about something the King of the Irish Faeries said to me once: ‘May those who love us love us, and may those who do not may the Lord turn their ankle so we know them by their limping.’” With a flourishing wave of his gloved hand, Hoggle fell just as he was reaching the door.

The Dwarf got him, dusted himself off with a grunt, dared not look back, and continued for the exit. Sarah gasped. A giggle started in the throngs of Goblins and swiftly grew to full-blown, uproarious laughter. “Jareth, that’s not nice! Turn him back this instant!” She’d seen her husband do a multitude of cruel tricks over the years since she had first met when he’d kidnapped her baby brother, but nothing she’d seen had prepared her to watch Hoggle running for all his might, his legs turned backwards!

“It’s only a spot of glamour,” Jareth murmured in dismay.

“I don’t care what it is!” Sarah retorted hotly. “Turn him back!”

“Very well.” The King sighed. “Your wish is my command.” Still, he pouted. “I was just trying to have a little fun.”

“Not like that!”

Jareth waved his hand. Hoggle’s body was returned to normal, and he shot out of the throne room going as fast and hard as he could. The Goblins fell over themselves, clutching their small, green sides with huge guffaws of laughter.

“That wasn’t funny.” Sarah tisked, looking away from the lot of them. “Not funny at all.”

Jareth looked down at his beautiful wife, witnessed her true dismay, and felt a stab of regret that not for what he had done to Hoggle but rather only for having upset her. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I did not know a mere illusion would upset you so.”

Sarah thought about trying to explain to him that there were people who were born with their body parts turned backwards or shrunken and others who were hurt to the point that their feet and sometimes even their legs were bent entirely backwards. She sighed and pushed the thought away. It would do no good. This was Jareth after all, and although she knew he loved her, the man possessed no sympathy whatsoever. She kept her gaze turned stubbornly away.

“I am sorry,” Jareth repeated again. “It was only glamour.”

She looked back up at him finally, back up into those enchanting eyes and sensual pout and found herself instantly melting inside, as she did every time she gazed upon him. It was no wonder she could never stay mad at him, or had kept hunting for him as an adult until she had finally been reunited with him. Having had no baby to defend against him, Sarah had finally been able to act on her own, true desires, and they had been together ever since.

Still, she was constantly learning new things about him, like the fact that he possessed the ability to cast glamour spells. “I didn’t know you were able to do glamour,” she commented at length. “I thought that was Fairy magic.”

“Goblins are a subset of Dark Fairies,” Jareth remarked, surprising her even more. “We can do everything our counterparts can do.”

Their eyes locked, and for the first time, Sarah considered that the form she saw before her might not be her husband’s true form. She had seen him adopt many disguises since he had first come into her life. She had witnessed him turn into an owl and other animals as well. A chill touched her, raising the hairs on her arms as she considered what her husband’s true, natural form might be. Was he not at all like the beautiful man she saw before her? Was he some kind of giant, horrendous Goblin instead? It would make much more sense for one of their own to be their King after all.

“Sarah?” Jareth asked and was hit with concern as she lowered her eyes shyly from his.

“Whatever you’re thinking,” he ordered, “don’t.”

Sarah’s gaze immediately flicked back up to his. “Really? Jareth, after all this time, do you really think you can command me not to think something?”

“No,” he answered truthfully, giving in to a smile, “but I can certainly try. What were you thinking just now?”

“You don’t want to know,” she blurted out before she could think of a better answer. She saw the concern in his eyes be replaced by . . . Was that fear she saw? Actual fear in her husband’s eyes? Her heart beat faster. She hadn’t seen him look like that since . . . since just before she defeated him in the Labyrinth the first time around. He feared she might turn from him, she might toss him away as she had before.

“Never gonna happen.” Her whisper surprised them both for she hadn’t meant to say the words out loud, but it was true, she realized a second after she had both thought and spoken them. It didn’t matter if Jareth’s natural form didn’t have the incredible looks she saw before her. It wouldn’t even matter if he was some huge and hideous Goblin. What mattered was the man she loved, and he would still be that man, rather human, Goblin, or owl.

“It doesn’t matter anyway,” she spoke softly, reaching up, grabbing his hand, and pulling it down to her. She kissed its back as she told him, “I’ll love you anyway always and forever.”

“Forever’s not long at all,” he whispered, his lips quirking up into a smile.

“It’s not,” she agreed, “when it comes to loving you.” She stood, still holding to his hand, and let him lead her around his throne to stand directly before him.

He shifted his long legs, placing his feet on the floor, and brought her forth to him between his legs. He released her hand to cup her face instead and stroked her long, black hair in loving, sweeping gestures with both hands. “It could never be long enough,” he decreed, “to love you.” He kissed her long and deep then, sweeping her up into his strong arms and onto his lap. She cradled his growing arousal there and kissed him back, just as long, just as deep, and just as in love with him as he always had been with her. Oh, yeah, it didn’t matter if he was a Goblin or not; she loved him just the way he was!


The End

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