Author: Kat Lee
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Challenge/Prompt: nekid_spike Harlot's Choice: Spike Gets Wet
Word Count: 1,279
Date Written: 10 July 2017
Disclaimer: All characters within belong to Whedon, not the author, and are used without permission.
Why the bloody Hell, Spike wonders, ducking, hitting the pavement hard, and rolling swiftly out from underneath a blaze of red-hot fire, does crap always have to hit him whenever he's just trying to mind his own business?! He was only out for a walk tonight, just a bloody, simple walk while night settled in and he waited for his girlfriend to get off of her paying job so that they could go to work together, when he stumbled across this mess. At first, he'd tried to back up without being seen, intending not to run away but to take stock of the situation before entering the fray, but he'd been spotted and the beast had been after him ever since.
He cusses a blue streak as he runs, barely ahead of the monster and wishes again that he'd somehow thought to bring a bloody sword with him. This is SunnyHell, though, and if he were to try to keep every weapon on him he might need, he'd barely be able to move for the arsenal. A bloke never knew what was coming his way when on the Hellmouth. It was often other Vampires and Demons, sometimes Werewolves, creatures from other dimensions, and even occasionally a dark god, but tonight . . . Tonight, it had to be a bloody dragon!
He runs ahead of the beast, barely keeping from being hit by the fire it keeps snorting, and turns another sharp corner. His booted feet slid to an abrupt stop as he looks around him. "BOLLOCKS!" Somehow, in trying to escape being fried alive by the beast, he's managed to turn around and ended up right back where he'd first seen the giant lizard appear in the night air!
But this time, he hears a voice. He concentrates on the small, feminine voice and follows it to behind a headstone. "What the bloody Hell do you think you're doing, bit?!" The girl can not be more than thirteen, fourteen at the most; yet, somehow, she's gotten her hands on to a frayed, ancient book of dark magic.
She lifts her head dyed dark and looks dismissively at him. "I'm not after you, Vampire -- " she starts arrogantly.
"I don't care if you're after me or not! Your damn pet lizard is!" Spike snarls, leaping to her side.
She screeches and scuttles backwards against the headstone. "I swear I'm not after you! I was just after the guy who broke my heart!"
He snarls again, and she looks pale as his fangs gnash at the humid, Summer air. "What?! Some boy dumped you, so you'd thought you'd enact an ancient curse?!"
"Y-Yeah. Of course! Why not?"
"MAYBE BECAUSE YOU'LL GET INNOCENT, BLOODY BYSTANDERS CAUGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF IT?!" he roars. He's far from innocent, but that's beside the point! The dragon roars again, spitting more fire. Spike jumps toward the headstone and comes down with the fledgling Witch and her spellbook beneath him. "Where'd the Hell you find this thing at any way?!"
"It -- It was at the library! I didn't think it would really work!" she admits as the dragon stomps closer to them, its mighty footsteps shaking the whole town.
Spike snorts. "So you thought you'd use some ancient, dead Latin and a . . . " He shakes the small dragon she dropped when he jumped her and rolled her just out of the real dragon's fire. "What is this thing?! A bloody beanie baby?!" He'd never recognize it if he wasn't for Dawn's and Willow's collection.
The girl's pale face falls. She looks genuinely sad, but not sorrowful for her own actions and the chaos they've brought. Slowly, she nods.
Spike lets loose another torrent of cuss words. The dragon roars above them; one huge, scaly foot slams down just beside the girl. "Can't you do something?!" she cries, throwing her hands over her head.
He glowers at her. "You're the one who conjured it! I should leave you to rot with the thing!"
But she's only a kid, he remembers, a little girl that some randy, brat bastard hurt, a girl who, he realizes isn't that much older than Dawn. He can see the Nibblet making the same mistake if she found a book of spells and didn't already know all she does about the arcane. "You're damn lucky I came along, kid!" Snatching a dagger from his boot, Spike stabs first the book and then the beanie baby. He severs the stuffed dragon clean off of its tiny neck. The beast above them roars its anguish one last time and explodes.
The girl's shudders become a sobbing, heart-wrenching cry. Spike snarls silently as he wipes blood, sweat, and other pieces of the dragon he'd really rather not identify from his face and blonde hair. Then he turns the attention back to the book whose spells enabled the girl to cause all this. He glances at the page and snorts as he realizes it was a spell intended to bring a fairy tale to life. She must have intended to be the Princess and make the boy who'd broken her heart become her Prince.
"Fat chance of that happening," Spike mutters, wiping more wet, sticky substances from his body and clothes. He stabs the book again several times with his dagger, then rips the sucker page from page. The girl is too busy crying to protest. He throws the pages at her in disgust. "The next time some brat breaks your heart, find another way to wreck your vengeance that won't kill everybody else around!" he snarls, his fangs showing again.
She stops sobbing long enough to nod. She tries to scuttle further away from him, but her back is already pressed against the headstone. He rolls his eyes, a habit he picked up from Dawn and her sister, and suddenly realizes that he's late to meet Buffy. He pushes to his feet and walks away, the tails of his trench coat flapping around his long legs, without another look back at the girl. He will, however, he decides, have to talk to Ripper about what books are available at the local library -- and they'd damn well better have been at the town library, instead of the school. If the girl got her hands on that book because of a slip up the Watcher made, Spike will make damn sure he never gets to forget about it!
The Vampire's legs quickly eat up the distance, and it doesn't take him long to reach where Buffy's waiting for him, glancing again at her watch. She looks up as he approaches. She starts to smile but soon grimaces in sympathy instead. "You look like Hell."
He shrugs, and his dark lips toy with a grin. "I had to slay a dragon to get here." Quickly, he closes the remaining space between them.
"Yeah?" she asks, looking up at him as he cups her face. She smiles; he draws a thumb across that beautiful smile. "I didn't realize you're a Knight."
"Oh, yeah," he says. "Doesn't every Knight have to slay a dragon to get to his Princess?" His voice lowers, and he growls huskily across her smiling lips, "Now shut up and kiss me, Princess." She actually does, for once, as he commands, and as he tastes her hot, sweet kiss and moans beneath her touch, his tongue sliding up to meet and twist around hers, he realizes that Buffy is and will always be his Princess, even if he isn't and would never be, a real Knight and he'll gladly slay whatever dragon it takes any and every time to get to her side.