Author: Kat Lee
Challenge/Prompt: 1_million_words Bingo: Kisses
Word Count: 869
Date Written: 28 February 2017
Disclaimer: All characters within belong to their rightful owners, not the author, and are used without permission.
She's always been able to reasonably explain the things that have happened to her. She might not have always liked them, like having to grow up alone and never being loved before, but she's always been able to explain them -- until Toby. Until the first time his lips touched hers. The sensations he sent sweeping through her body with his first kiss were unlike anything she'd ever felt before.
She tried to explain them away. She used every excuse in the book, from the fact that she's rarely ever been kissed before and had it mean so much to the old "only sexual arousal trick". She told herself it wouldn't keep happening, but it has. Every time he's kissed her, he's done unimaginable, unexplainable things to her. He's doing it to her this very instant.
Her knees are weak. She feel like she can barely stand without his arms wrapped around her as they are now. She needs him this close so that their bodies are pressing tightly together. She needs him closer, really. She needs him as close as to people can ever possibly be.
And all of that are only the beginning symptoms. She can't think straight when he holds her, when he touches her, especially when he kisses. All sense and reason escapes her. She feels like she's melting into him, and she wants to go. She doesn't want to be Happy Quinn any more. She wants to be Happy and Toby, to be one with him forever.
Such isn't possible, she knows or so she tells herself, not for women like her and especially not for her. She can't wear his ring on her finger. She can't have a future with him. Her future is already sealed, already limited. She has a husband, a fact she can't bear to tell him. She used to run from his advances because she was afraid of being hurt, but now she's afraid of hurting him. She wonders when it changed, when he finally earned her trust so completely that she no longer fears him breaking her heart.
Toby abruptly breaks off their kiss. She's suddenly aware that he's been watching her eyes. "What?" she whispers, her voice almost hoarse. Even now, she feels like she's dying of thirst that only the lips of this incorrigible, goofy, irritating, and yet wonderful man can sate. She wonders again if this desire he's created inside of her can truly be sated and doubts it can.
"Don't do that."
"What?" she asks in honest confusion, tilting her head to one side as she studies him closer. Does he wonder? she wonders, her heart beating almost violently against her breastbone. He can't know! He can't guess what he does to her. He may be a doctor with a plethora of degrees, but he's not half as smart as he's always claiming he is.
"You're wondering how I did that thing with my tongue."
"What?" She frowns. "No, I'm not!"
"Then what," he asks, intently studying her beautiful eyes, "are you wondering?"
He's not going to hurt her. Maybe she can tell him a little bit of the truth.
"You're thinking about something, Happy. Thinking seriously about something when you shouldn't be thinking at all."
"If you must know," she answers, feeling his muscles tense around her and not wanting him to stop touching her, holding her, loving her, "I was wondering how you do what you do to me."
"Sweetheart," Toby answers with a broad grin, "I know a lot of things in this world, but even I can't explain the phenomena of love." God knows if he had, he would have given up on winning her heart long ago, but he hadn't. He had been as completely unable to get her out of his system as she apparently is to get him out of hers. They're meant to be together. There's no stopping it, and he doesn't want to stop it. Like he said, some things, especially the best things in life and love with Happy Quinn is the very best of the best, are simply unexplainable.
She caresses his grinning face, runs her fingers over his stubble, and realizes that she's grown to love those dark hairs almost as much as she loves the very grin that used to make her want to smack him when they first met. She shrugs, the closest she'll ever come to admitting he's right. "Just do it again."
"Oh, I will," he vows, kissing her. "And again." He kisses her. "And again." He kisses her. "And again." He kisses her. "And again." He kisses her, but when he goes to move to speak once more, she catches his tongue with her teeth and holds him steadfastly in her mouth. He melts into her.
They melt together, Toby's last thought being the conclusion of his sentence, Forever. He'll forever love this woman, but he'll never try to figure out what makes them love each other and work so well ever again. He gave that up when she finally kissed him again. He's got more important things to do than figuring out the unexplainable, and at the very top of that list is loving his Happy Quinn.