Author: Kat Lee
Fandom: Full House
Character/Pairing: Jesse/Danny, DJ/Kimmy
Word Count: 3,541
Disclaimer: All characters within belong to their rightful owners, not the author, and are used without permission.
DJ runs into her bedroom, breathless, and slams the door behind her. Her best friend looks up from her bed and quickly hides her diary so DJ won't know she's been reading it -- although if she knew, she wouldn't care quite as much as she'd act like she did, because there are truths about her feelings that she doesn't even confide to that precious book. "What's wrong, Dej?" Kimmy asks in concern.
"I . . . I . . . I . . . I just saw . . . " DJ gasps, her beautiful face drained of its color.
Kimmy rolls to her feet and starts to walk toward her. "Well, I know you didn't just see momma kissing Santa Claus." She grimaces, realizing what she's said and immediately starts to apologize. "I'm sorry," she says, knowing how much her friend misses her mother. "That was lame."
DJ shakes her head. "It's okay, Kimmy. Actually," she looks thoughtful, "it wasn't too far off."
Kimmy frowns. "What did you see, Dej?" she asks again.
"I . . . I saw . . . " DJ looks up into her tall, lean friend's eyes. "I saw Uncle Jesse kissing Dad!" she exclaims in a high-pitched and quick squeak.
Kimmy's mouth falls wide open. She shuts it after a long moment, then whispers hoarsely, "Well, that explains why he's never fallen for my charms."
DJ casts her friend a new look, but before she can say something, she decides she can't really blame Kimmy for thinking so highly of her charms. After all, she might be an outcast at school, something that DJ herself isn't too far from being and hasn't been ever since her classmates learned that instead of a mother and father, she's got her dad and three uncles, all of whom she loves dearly and who love her -- and who, she realizes, she still loves even now. Somebody in the Tanner household has fallen for Kimmy; it just isn't her Uncle Jesse.
"I . . . I guess," DJ says slowly, "I can understand why they wouldn't tell us."
"That's what you've got to say about this? That you understand?" Kimmy asks in disbelief. "Your uncle was just kissing your father! Two men in your family are kissing each other! Your dad's gay! No wonder he ends up breaking up with every woman he's dated after your mother! And speaking of your mom, did he ever love her, or was he in love with your uncle all the time?"
"I . . . I don't know," DJ whispers, her confusion growing. "But I do know one thing," she adds after a moment.
"What?" her friend asks.
DJ meets her eyes again. "I don't care if they are gay," she states determinedly with a shake of her head. "It doesn't change how much I love them."
"But they've been lying to you all your life!"
"Gay people tend to lie. They think they have to, because they're scared of how the world will react if they know they're gay."
"When did you become a gay expert?"
DJ falls silent, but she stares into Kimmy's eyes as she remains quiet and contemplates her answer. They're beautiful eyes that she's seen so many times in her dreams. They've stared into each other's before for long periods of time while talking and laughing and sometimes not even doing anything. She doesn't have to do anything when she's with Kimmy; she just enjoys being near her. She enjoys being near her, and there's so much more that she's always wanted to do with her.
She takes in a shaky breath, still contemplating her next move. She glances up at the mistletoe headband Kimmy's been wearing all day, tempting somebody to kiss her. Nobody has. Nobody's even wanted to -- except DJ. "Kimmy, I'm . . . I'm . . . I . . . " She tries again, but she can't seem to make the words come out of her mouth. Gathering all her courage, she steps closer to her best friend in all the world and swiftly presses her lips to hers.
DJ draws back almost as quickly as she kisses Kimmy. Kimmy's eyes are wide and round, but DJ doesn't see any reflection of disgust or anger. She isn't pulling away from her -- yet, but she also isn't saying anything. She's just staring at her as though she's never seen her before in her life. "Kimmy," DJ whispers, "say something. Anything," she pleads.
A long, long moment stretches between them. Just as DJ's head begins to drop, her smile completely gone, her face even more pale, the knowledge that she's just lost her friend on whom she's also been crushing for years settling sickeningly into her heart, Kimmy finally speaks. "Wow," she whispers, and before either girl can say anything else, a knock sounds on DJ's door.
The girls look toward the door, both wearing twin expressions of startlement. "DJ," Jesse calls from the other side of the door, "can we talk?"
DJ and Kimmy look at each other. "What do I say?" DJ whispers urgently. Kimmy shakes her head and shrugs.
"Please?" Jesse adds.
DJ nods and moves toward her door. Kimmy stays still, watching through wide eyes. DJ takes a deep breath, squares her shoulders, and opens her door. "Uncle Jesse?" she asks as she looks up at him and recognizes that he is still the same man. She saw him kiss her father. She knows their secret now, but he's still the same man. He's still the same man who used to sing her lullabies and would sit by her bedside and strum on his guitar, crooning to her, whenever she'd had a nightmare until she fell back asleep. He's the same man who helped her to learn how to ride horses, and the same man who held her still in his strong, reassuring arms when she finally broke down after trying so hard to be strong for her baby sisters when they lost her mother.
He's the same man she's always loved as much as her father, but now he stands before her looking more afraid than she's seen him since her mother was so badly sick. His face is pale as hers had been earlier. He tucks his hands behind his back, but not before she notices that they're shaking ever so slightly. She concentrates on spreading her lips into a smile, but before she can tell him it's okay, he asks her again, "Can we talk?"
"Yeah," she answers, nodding. "Sure." She backs away so that he can enter her bedroom.
He jerks his head at Kimmy. "Without the Gibbler," he specifies.
"Hey, it's okay, dude." Kimmy strides by him and pats his chest boldly as she goes through the door. "Now I know why you don't like me. You're gay. It's cool."
Jesse stares at her in disbelief.
DJ quickly pipes up. "Kimmy, will I see you again?"
Jesse frowns, wondering what he's missed and considering DJ's strange question.
Kimmy grins wide. "Of course," she says, giving her dearest friend a wink. "Wild horses couldn't drag me away." She looks back at Jesse. "And don't worry. Your secret's safe with me. I won't tell any one you're gay."
Then she's gone, leaving Jesse alone with DJ. DJ quietly shuts her door, glad that Stephanie's still busy making cookies with Joey in the kitchen. "You told her?" Jesse asks in disbelief the moment the door's shut.
DJ shrugs. "I had to talk to somebody," she tells him. "It's not like I was expecting to see you kiss Dad!"
Jesse inclines his dark head in a humbled nod. "About that," he starts to say, but DJ interrupts him.
"It's okay, Uncle Jesse. I understand."
He stares at her. "You do?"
"Of course. You love my Dad." She shrugs as though it's just another common, everyday fact about their family. "I've got questions of course, but like Kimmy said, I'm cool with it."
"Of course!" She grins up at him. "Hey, I love you two! Why wouldn't I love you just because you love each other?"
Jesse sinks down onto the nearest bed, which just happens to be Stephanie's behind him. He stares at his niece in both surprise and speechless gratitude. Slowly, he shakes his head.
He's comforted her so many times, but now it's her turn to comfort him. DJ walks over to him and wraps her arms tightly around her uncle. "It's okay," she says again. "I love you both. Nothing's ever going to change that. He's my Dad, and you're my Uncle Jesse! I will always love you!" She hugs him tightly and reassuringly.
Finally, Jesse finds the ability to move again while in her hug. He wraps his bigger arms around her and hugs her little body close. "Thank you, DJ," he whispers into her ear.
"And I won't tell anybody else," DJ continues, "I promise. And we really don't have to worry about Kimmy telling anybody either."
"DJ," Jesse asks slowly, "what makes you so sure about that?"
"I . . . " She stops. "I just know her. That's all." She shrugs. "If I ask her not to tell anybody, she won't."
"This is Kimmy. I know she's your friend, but -- "
"Trust me, Uncle Jesse," DJ pleads. "She won't tell anybody."
He decides to use a different tactic. "Do you understand why it's so important nobody knows about your father and I? Not even your sisters."
"Because you're scared they won't love you like I do."
He grins and gives her a little half nod. There is truth in what she says, but it's by far not the only reason. "There's more to it than that."
DJ frowns. "Like what?"
"Like your father could lose his job." His own job would be safe, but only because he and Joey work for themselves in one of the few careers where being gay isn't an automatic killer to the career pathway. "And worse." He gazes into her eyes. "Way worse." He doesn't even dare contemplate the other possibility.
"What?" DJ asks, her concern growing.
"They might take you three away from us."
"Because we're gay. The government would think your father an unfit parent. He might get visitation rights, but I wouldn't be allowed anywhere near you."
She frowns. "They can do that?!" She shakes her head. "No way!"
He places his hands on her shoulders to still her shaking and turns her head gently back to face him. "Yes way," he says sternly. "It's happened before. Parents have had their children taken away from them for many reasons, DJ, and not always because it's for the child's betterment," he explains, hoping she can understand what he's trying to tell her. "They take kids away from their parents because they're gay or because they're of a different religion."
"They can't do that," she whispers.
"Yes, they can," he responds gently but firmly. "They can, and they do. It happens all the time."
"But . . . But isn't that caused by the other parent, like in . . . in divorces and stuff?"
He shakes his head. "Not always. If the government ever finds out that your father and I are gay, and especially that we're living together in the house with you three, beautiful girls, they will take you away from us."
"They can't do that!"
"Yes, they can, DJ," he insists gently. "Now do you understand why it's so important you never tell anybody else?"
She nods quietly. "Yes," she whispers after a long moment, her young mind still whirling. She knew their country had problems. She knew their government wasn't always trustworthy, but she would have never thought they could do such a horrible, horrible thing. "And I won't. Ever. I promise!"
"Pinky swear?" Jesse asks, raising his pinky.
She nods firmly. "Pinky swears," she agrees, hooking her little finger around his.
They shake their pinkies on it before he asks, "Now what about Kimmy?"
"She . . . She won't tell anybody," she insists.
"What makes you so sure?"
"I'll talk to her. She doesn't want us to be hurt. She won't tell anybody."
Jesse stares into DJ's eyes, knowing there's something more she isn't telling him. "Dej?" he probes gently.
"I promise, Uncle Jesse, she won't tell anybody!"
"Okay," he says finally, inclining his head in another nod. "If you trust her, I guess that will have to be enough for us, too. But do you trust her with your whole family, knowing what the government will do if they find out?"
DJ nods, remembering the kiss she shared earlier with Kimmy with a very fond smile. "I do," she assures him.
"Okay. Are you sure you're cool with this?"
"Yes! I love you both!" She throws her arms around him and hugs him again.
Jesse returns her hug, then turns from he, stands, and walks to her closed door. He pushes it soundlessly open. "You can come in now."
DJ looks up in surprise as her father walks in carrying a tray of freshly baked cookies. His face looks every bit as pale and troubled as she knows her own must have looked earlier. "Did she -- ?" he starts to ask Jesse. His nod breaks off Danny's question, and she watches as her father gulps.
For the first time in her young life, she finds the tables turned. Her father and uncles have comforted her so many times over the years, but now it's her turn. She smiles brightly up at her dad. "It's okay," she tells him. "I know, and I'm not going to tell anybody."
"Else," Jesse mutters, which causes Danny's eyes to widen.
"Kimmy knows," DJ acknowledges with a shrug, "but it's okay. She won't tell any one either."
Danny passes the cookies to Jesse, takes his daughter's hand in his, walks over to her bed, and sinks down onto the mattress. "DJ," he starts slowly, picking his words carefully, "this is a very adult thing. Are you sure you're okay with all of this?"
She looks at him in surprise, and for a moment, Danny's afraid that she isn't going to be okay with the revelation of his true relationship with her uncle at all. Those fears are chased away, however, as she asks softly, "Why do you both keep asking me that? The fact that I know doesn't change anything." She shakes her head. "It doesn't change who you are or how I feel about you or how I know you both love me."
"Oh, Dej -- " Danny's voice breaks again as he wraps his daughter in a tight bear hug. "You really are the best daughter a father could ask for."
"Does that mean I'm getting a raise in my allowance?" she asks as she hugs him back.
Both adults laugh. Jesse nods. "I told you, Danny, it's going to be just fine. She's a smart kid, and she's full of love. We've done nothing wrong in raising her."
"Or in loving each other," DJ adds. "I'm not going to say I don't have questions, because I do. Lots of them. But I want the people I love to be happy, and if that means being together for you two, then that's what I want. And it's what Mom would want, too."
"Your mom was very supportive," Danny whispers before he can stop himself.
DJ looks up in surprise. "She knew? How long has this been going on?"
"She knew." Danny nods. "Since high school. I was the geekiest kid in class. She was very kind to me when the others . . . weren't so much."
DJ nods. She knows how geeky her father is now and can just imagine him as a kid. He was probably every one's favorite target. She can also easily see her mother standing up for him, as she herself has stood up for Stephanie and Kimmy too.
"And then I met her brother." Danny's gaze travels back to where Jesse still stands. "He was the coolest, most awesome guy I'd ever seen." Danny blushes lightly as he adds endearingly, "He still is."
Jesse grins, and DJ can't help but to see the sweetness between them. "So Mom knew," she says aloud, "and she supported you. But then, how did you end up married to her?"
"We wanted to have children. Jesse and I -- "
" -- can't have kids," DJ finishes for her father with another understanding nod. "And marrying Mom helped to hide the truth of your relationship to the world."
"That's right," Danny says. It's his turn to nod.
"And you're still hiding it today because you don't want the government to sweep in and take us away from you."
"That's right. There are other reasons. It would kill my career. Jesse would lose his 'cool guy' image. The neighbors would rally against us. You kids would be mistreated. You might not be allowed to see any of your friends any more, because their parents might not trust you around them."
"People are horrible," DJ whispers.
Jesse sits down on her other side. "Not all of them," he tells her gently, "but there's too many of them who are."
"Your mother used to say that people fear what they don't understand, and they don't understand how two guys, especially two guys who are as different as we are, can love each other."
"People are jerks too," Jesse comments quietly.
DJ nods. "You're both right," she says, having seen fear and prejudice already in her young life. She recalls too easily how she and her sister were shunned at school by everybody but Kimmy when they lost their mother, and she's seen how the black and Asian kids are treated at her school. They're made fun of because their skin is different. She can just imagine how people would act if they knew her father's and uncle's -- and her own too, for that matter -- hearts are different. "You don't have to worry," she says again. "I won't tell any one else."
"I still don't know about that Gibbler -- "
"Kimmy won't tell any one. I promise."
"Dej," Danny says gently, "she does tend to be rather . . . "
"Loud? Nosy?" DJ nods with a soft smile curving her lips. "Yes. She's both of those, but she's more. She's my best friend, Dad. She won't tell anybody. If you don't trust her, trust me when I tell you she won't."
Jesse wraps an arm around her. "We do trust you, DJ."
"Good." She grins, eyeing the cookies he set down on her dresser before joining her father and herself on her bed. "Now let's see about those cookies." Another question occurs to her. "But I do have one more question."
"You can ask us anything," Danny readily offers.
"Why did you send Uncle Jesse to talk to me?" she asks, looking up at her father. "You always make such a big deal about being the one to talk to us when we've done something wrong."
"You didn't do anything wrong, DJ. We did. We were the ones who broke our own rule about not kissing when you girls are home."
"But still, why send him? Why didn't you come?"
"Because I was scared," Danny admits, "and I was hoping he was wrong. Jesse saw you watching us. I was praying he was wrong. I don't want to lose you, Dej."
"Aw, Dad." Quickly, she hugs him again and again. "You'll never lose me," she whispers.
"Good," he says, kissing the top of her head, "because I'd be lost without you girls."
"We're always be right here," she promises, "but now cookie time!" She squirrels out of his arms, races across her bedroom, and grabs a cookie. It's still hot and tender. "Mmm. We should go help them."
"Actually, Stephanie needs to be cleaning up. It's past you girls' bedtime."
"Danny, lighten up. It's Christmas, man."
"It is Christmas, and our girls are the best. Okay. You can stay up another hour."
"All right!" DJ pumps a fist in the air in her excitement, then grabs another handful of cookies, and charges out of her room.
Left alone, Jesse slides closer to Danny. "See?" he asks, cupping a hand around his cheek and turning his boyfriend to face him. He beams. "I told you it was going to be all right."
Danny nods, leaning his cheek into Jesse's hand as he does so. "You were right," he admits, "thank God."
"And thank us," Jesse adds, "for raising three such wonderful young ladies." Finally, he kisses Danny again. Danny's lips part beneath his in planned protest, but as Jesse smoothly deepens their kiss, he finds himself unable to object.
Their heads jerk up at the exclamation, but they both smile as they see DJ grinning at them. "I'm just going to pull this closed," she says, tugging on the door, "to give you guys a little privacy."
"We really have done a great job, haven't we?" Danny asks, looking back to Jesse.
He nods. "Yeah, we have." He draws his thumb softly across Danny's smiling lips. "Now where were we? Oh, yeah." He gives a soft, Elvis-like snarl and goes back to kissing Danny again and again on that very merry Christmas Eve.